What is Gratitude and Why is it so Important?

Written By: Laura Squiers, LPC

“It is not happiness that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us happy.” 

- David Steindl-Rast

Gratitude is a practice of appreciation and thankfulness for the good in our lives. It is the intentional and conscious focus of the positives we experience on a daily or weekly basis. 

Research shows that regularly practicing gratitude can have both short and long-term benefits including: 

• Improved health 

• Reduced symptoms of anxiety and depression

• Better sleep 

• Increased happiness 

• Better social interactions

• Increased productivity 

• Increased resiliency 

To give more context, a study out of the University of California found that practicing gratitude can increase happiness by as much as 25%. Additional studies have shown that gratitude is linked to healthier blood pressure, better heart rates, and stronger immune systems. Another study by Psychotherapy Research found that participants who practiced daily gratitude showed improvements on mental health assessments compared to those who instead wrote about daily events. 

If you’re ready to incorporate gratitude into your routine, here are just a few examples of how to do that. One of the easiest ways is to start a gratitude journal, listing 3-5 things per day that you are grateful for. Another way is to be intentional about thanking people you interact with, for example a waiter at a restaurant, your mailman, or your child’s teacher. This can be in person or in the form of a thank you letter. And lastly, pay attention to when you might be falling into a comparison trap. Comparing yourself to others can leave you feeling less than and deflated. Instead of thinking about what you’re lacking, try focusing on what you have that you’re grateful for! 

Laura Squiers, LPC

How to Support a Loved One With Anxiety

Written By: Laura Squiers, LPC

How to Support a Loved One With Anxiety 

1. Understand what anxiety is and what symptoms are associated with it - anxiety symptoms can vary widely depending on the person. Some symptoms include worry, uneasiness, irritability, or anger but this is not an exhaustive list. Taking some time to research or communicate with your loved one about their specific symptoms can also be helpful. 

2. Reassure them that you’re there for them - oftentimes, people with anxiety welcome support as it means they don’t have to carry the burden alone. 

3. Actively listen - ask them how you can best support them. 

4. Keep communication open and non-judgmental - if possible, maintain consistent communication and check-ins. As someone who doesn’t have anxiety, it may be difficult to empathize at times, but try not to judge, criticize, or invalidate your loved one.  

A few don'ts: 

1. Don’t expect symptoms to change immediately. 

2. If you find yourself getting frustrated, take some personal space. 

3. Don’t put pressure on them to change or talk about things. 

Try the ‘5,4,3,2,1’ technique with your loved one as a way to help ease their anxiety by helping them focus on the present moment. The goal of this technique is to help connect you with each of your five senses: sight, touch, hearing, smell, and taste. 

First, take a couple of deep breaths, then begin to acknowledge things around you according to each of your five senses. 

*The order of the senses can be changed but the method should remain the same. 

5: Find FIVE things you see around you, name them aloud. 

4: Find FOUR things you can touch, name them aloud. 

3: Find THREE things you can hear, name them aloud. 

2: Find TWO things you can smell, name them aloud. 

1: Find ONE thing you can taste, name them aloud.

Laura Squiers, LPC

5 Tips for Setting and Maintaining Personal Boundaries

Written By: Laura Squiers, LPC

5 Tips for Setting and Maintaining Personal Boundaries

Maybe you’ve heard the term ‘boundaries’ before, and have had practice implementing them into your life - or maybe you’re new to the concept and could use a little guidance in that area. Either way, here, we’ll list 5 ways to help you set your own strong, personal boundaries.  

Boundaries are so important when it comes to establishing and protecting our mental health! Healthy limits around what you will do and how you will be treated can play a vital role in so many areas of our lives, including professional and personal relationships. 

1. Recognize that you deserve to be treated with respect 

One of the biggest barriers to setting and maintaining personal boundaries comes from the false belief that we don’t deserve to hold them, and thus, don’t deserve respect from others. This is, of course, not true! If you find that this is something you struggle with, know that it’s possible to work through those erroneous beliefs, you don’t have to stay stuck in that mindset. 

2. Know your values 

Taking some time to list out your values, priorities, and limits can help when it comes time to determine if something is within our set of boundaries or not. Instead of saying “yes” to someone else, first make sure you’re saying “yes” to yourself! 

3. Be consistent

Oftentimes, when we’re just starting out with setting boundaries, we get pushback from people around us who aren’t used to hearing “no”. Because of this, it’s important to be ready to stand your ground and remain consistent with what you want and need. 

4. Communicate clearly 

It’s okay to say “no”! Practice saying “no” when you don’t want to do something and remember that you don’t ever have to explain yourself or provide an excuse. 

5. Respect other people’s boundaries 

It’s important to understand that people (you included!) can set boundaries to protect their own well-being. When we accept this as a positive, it’s much easier to be gracious and respectful to your friends and loved ones who are setting boundaries for themselves. 

If these concepts and behaviors are foreign or seem uncomfortable to you, that’s okay! Try experimenting with them, and fine-tune the process to something that works for you. In the end, establishing healthy boundaries is an excellent form of self-care and does wonders for your emotional and mental health. 

Laura Squiers, LPC